Friday, October 16, 2009

Password Protected

Am I the only person who continually gets locked out of my various online accounts because I can't remember my password? Sounds easy enough - set up a username and password, log in, and Robert's your mother's brother. However...

My attempts at setting up accounts generally go something like this.

Set your username: JANNY (well... I'm not about to give you my real log in, eh? 'course not. I can't remember it!) Naturally, I write it down.
Username not available. Suggest JANNYA19, JANNYX&5 OR JANNYP79Q
I type in JANNYP, and write that down.
Username not available. Suggest JANNYPZ59, JANNYPX((5 OR PJANNY740Z
Grrrrrrrr.
Sulkily, I select JANNYA19.
Set your password: PANSY. I write it down.
Password strength: weak.
PANSYPANSY:
Password strength: weak. Password must include at least one non-letter character.
PANSYPANSY1. I write that down.
Password not available.
PANSYPANSY2
Password not available.
PANZYPANSY2
Success! Login to go to your account now.
OK, so that wasn't difficult, was it? I have only to type in JANNYA19 and then PANSYPANSY2.
Only of course that doesn't work, 'cos I forgot to change the S into a Z. I meant to write it down, but after writing down several failed attempts, I just gave up. So, next time I try to log in, I have to hit Forgot password. The site obligingly sends me a new one, and then asks me to enter my old one so I can change it to the new one. Only I can't, because I forgot the old one. And the new one is something like BEETLETRACKSANSCRITX19OOPS 56 and I can't remember it. And the verification box is full of drunken squiggles that might be 2s, zs, Zs or 7s. Maybe.
My accounts are securely password protected all right. They're password protected from ME!

10 comments:

Sheryl Gwyther said...

Hilarious, Sally! Why do I get the definite feeling of deju vu reading this? lol :)

Dee said...

I am totally with you there, Sally. Passwords are horrendous. They come in the same hated category as those 'pin numbers' that were supposed to make our life so much easier:-)

Trish said...

That's so funny, Sally. I know how you feel. Recently, and I swear this is true, I tried to change the password that my ISP provider gave me, but every time I did, my internet went out - but not only mine, the whole village where I live lost the internet too, That's if they were with the same provider. I thought it must have been a coincidence, but it happened about eight times. I complained of course and they said it wasn't possible. It was over a week before it stopped happening. All I wanted to do was check my ISP account as I was on a low usage at the time and didn't want to go over my limit.

Now I'm terrified to change a password anywhere.

Margaret Tanner said...

Hi Sally,
You must have been reading my mind. Exactly what you say happens to me all the time. Oh and I hve tried writing the password down then I go and lose the piece of paper so I am no better off.
If you find a cure to this ailment plese let me know.
Cheers
Margaret

Sally_Odgers said...

There IS the option of storing all passwords in a folder called PASSWORDS in the computer, but for some reason that's discouraged... I remember doing this in desperation and using cryptic terms like "Elsie +2" and "miner" to reflect two numbers (99 and 49, 'cos my grandmother Elsie died at 97, and "miner, forty niner" is from "My Darling Clementyne", but I got TOO cryptic and locked myself out.

Trudie Trewin said...

Lol, feeling your pain, Sally!
I've done the cryptic thing too, and disguised passwords in my address book, as bogus people and phone numbers, but then not been able to remember which parts of the name and number were the passwords, and which were the decoy. Seemed so obvious at the time!

Trudie Trewin said...

Lol, feeling your pain, Sally!
I've done the cryptic thing too, and disguised passwords in my address book, as bogus people and phone numbers, but then not been able to remember which parts of the name and number were the passwords, and which were the decoy. Seemed so obvious at the time!

Lexie Mitchell said...

I thought I was the only one this happened to. What a relief.
Actually I do put all mine into my address book. It is so cluttered and messy that I'm the only that can decipher it, so I figure I'm safe.
Lexie Mitchell

Lisa said...

Oh, I can totally relate to this!!! How frustrating the digital world is...

kanishk said...

They come in the same hated category as those 'pin numbers' that were supposed to make our life so much easier
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